God gave us memories that we may have roses in December. Although
these are not my own words, but a quote from a source long forgotten, I
have returned to them frequently for their truth and beauty. Roses
being one of my favorite flowers, It is an easy bridge from the image
of the red blossoms that pose for a few weeks each summer in my back
yard to my Auntie Viola, who taught me to love them as she did. While
Auntie Viola passed on years ago, and my roses are settled into their
out-of-season repose, the idea that our memories are gardens reflecting
the rich detail of our lives and its accessibility to us, means we can
revisit our experiences, thoughts and feelings amy time we want, and
enjoy again the tangibility of relationships and events from earlier
times. Happy memories rekindle warmth, tenderness and delight. Tougher
situations recalled give logic and perspective to feelings that, at the
time we lived them, overwhelmed or frightened us. Memories are
important parts of our lives. Working back through dimly lit hallways
from our childhood, high school or college years teaches us not only
where we have been, but also how our choices have shaped our lives.
Redirecting our memories to challenge us to grow into who we want to
become is also the gift of recognizing how we may choose to view past
experiences and life in the present moment.
Retracing memories is perhaps one of the most useful tools to
reveal our lives to us in new ways, and to assist us in integrating our
experiences as lasting, positive parts of our lives. Journaling this
process is particularly useful for several reasons. Just as a written
historical record of an event creates a touchstone to which we can
return for reassurance, hope or confirmation, so does a journaled
account of a memory. What was your first day of school like? What ever
became of the presents and the guests from your thirteenth birthday
party? Where were you, and what were you doing, when we crossed over
into the new millennium? What did you like best about your vacation
last year? What is your first memory of your grandparents? All of these
are roses blooming in your memory, ready to be savored. If you have no
idea where to begin, the idea itself can become your toehold. Almost
like an object lesson, favorite items related to the memory can also
jostle our minds, relinquishing long-buried facts and feelings that can
be jotted down, pondered and reassembled into an orderly, cohesive
format. Report cards, art projects, favorite articles of clothing, and
photographs, can help nudge your psyche to assist you in retrieving
almost any memory you would like to reconnect with, and have at hand
whenever the mood suits you.
Being able to return to our memories allows us to remind
ourselves of where we were, where we are now, and where we would like
to direct ourselves in the future. Rather than playing tricks on us in
the midst of stressful or anxious times, our memories can serve us,
become our allies, our comforters and our guides. Remembering and
writing down how you lived through a challenging experience, such as
losing a job or facing an undesirable move to another part of the
country, gives you a foothold if a similar situation ever comes up
again. Cherishing the moment of grace as your first love enters your
life is a great blessing. Remembering it each time you come back to it
in your journal makes that experience a blessing for all time.
Reminding yourself of the sweetness of a summer's night in the middle
of winter means you can still hold onto the rhythm of life in the
seasons themselves. Rather than feeling stuck in our memories, unable
to release them to move forward in our lives, journaling our memories
allows us to place them in perspective, integrate them into our lives,
and use them as tools to continue to create and develop our futures.
To that end, memories are also great mysteries that evolve over
time as they overlap in our hearts and souls, and fill in the gaps in
our consciousness that we have left behind. It is fascinating to me
that our whole lives are literally stored in our heads. Granted, there
are a few pieces of information flitting around in each of us that is
better left untouched and silent. But most of this compact filing
system, and how we've organized it for ourselves, is quite a miracle.
The more we know of our memories, the more we can unravel the great
mystery that is our own in which to delight. It is a tremendous gift to
know oneself fully. From that point of reference can be launched many
good choices, from career to life partner. Nobody else can do that for
us, or should. Journaling your memories puts your life work in your own
hands, and allows you to shape your future with consciousness and
wholeness.
Finally, what is wonderful about journaling memories is that
you can start wherever you like, and continue in any direction you
choose. It is your life, your garden and your roses. Equally wonderful
is the garden you can create in your heart and soul, a garden you can
visit any time, any season, whenever you choose to open your journal
and remember.
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About The Author
Cory L. Kemp
As an ordained minister I have worked in educational ministries
in several congregations, as well as pastoring a congregation. My
writing has focused on nonfiction essays and I have recently submitted
a theological memoir for publication. My ministerial background and
love of writing have combined to develop Creating Women Ministries, a
website dedicated to encouraging theological dialogue, particularly
among women, through workshops, journaling and personal spiritual
development. My website can be found at http://www.creatingwomenministries.com and I can be reached by email at creatingwomen@irun.com. My blog is located at http://creatingwomenministries.blogspot.com.
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This article was posted on November 05, 2005